Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Does not travel well with others

LAS VEGAS — I can only imagine the tears one Las Vegas teen must be crying at this hour.

Maybe he was coming home from some far flung sumer camp where he learned to love himself, or maybe a weekend trip to Grandma's up in Port Washington. Possibly he was finishing a tour of the sights of this God Fearing country and was waiting for his family to bring up the car.

Whatever this kids was doing at the Las Vegas Airport on thing is true; it took my mother a whole 30 minutes in the City of Sin to commit grand theft larceny as she grabbed the kid's bag and made a mad dash for The Strip.

The family would later find out that as she was frantically pulling bags out of the airport to throw them in the car she had also grabbed this kids unmarked duffel bag that held close to a $1,000 worth of electronics and CDs. All in an attempt to get the hell out of dodge as she tried once again to outrun her deep-seeded fear of airports.

Oh, yes. Airports. Not flying, Not security. Just the airport experience itself.

She seizes up as she walks though the terminal. Approaching bag check-in her eyes glaze over and become bloodshot as she begins to shake and heave luggage at the nearest person in a uniform. Nothing could ever reverse this train wreck hurtling toward the security check point as she throws her hands in the air and loudly bemoans the fact that the grandparents have to get an extra pat-down.

All that's missing is the little fleck of spittle at the corner of her mouth that could indicate she might have rabies. That might actually be easier to explain.

When we tried checking in to fly on a family trip to New York last year, I had to physically restrain the woman as my brothers tried to get bags checked and everyone through security. Once the dust settles, though, everything returns to normal and we are free to travel - sans crazy.

But this time the rush and madness got to everyone as no one questioned the extra bag she had grabbed in the Vegas Terminal. It was not until curisoity got the best of one brother at the hotel that he deicded to check out the situation.

Meanwhile, in Kansas City, I shake my head and hope she does not grab an extra kids in her zeal to get out of the airport on the way home.

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