The Wednesday Weekly

Sunset on the week

2010-03-11T22:15:00.002-06:00

Wild week comes to an end.

Conan O'Brien is coming to town and I managed to score tickets. Seems he has sold out all 30 shows he has planned across the country. From what the inter-webs are reporting, he is giving all the money he raises from the tour to the old Tonight Show staff, which will be traveling with him.

———

Don't forget: On Saturday I will be at MCC-Longview all day kicking off my free computer learning classes.

The whole day is designed to offer free classes and resources to Baby Boomers, but since I am focusing on computer training any age group would benefit.

Hopefully I can use this workshop as a model to show that older communities (especially in the urban core and immediate surrounding suburban areas) need this kind of a resource readily available for free.

Babysitting the Student Media and Senate

2010-03-11T10:29:00.009-06:00

Back in my old firebrand journalism days I thought I was pretty hot shit with my Student Media Credentials in 2004.

When the Student Senate tried to impeach the Student Body President for underage drinking there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth (admittedly created by the paper itself). The situation only got worse when entire Senate announced it was going behind closed doors to make its decision.

Accusations were thrown around about how our First Amendment rights were being stifled... free speech was being choked out...lawsuits were pending for this egregious attack against the student media and, in the end, the students themselves... Then things really got out of hand.

Police were called to handle security and beat back the wild-eyed reporters that were trying to break into the closed meeting.

With the threat of a billy club across my skull if I attempted to cross the police barricade, I stood outside and waited with the Vice Chancellor and director of student activities — who had come out to watch the fireworks of what was supposed to be a physical beating of the Student Body President...

Being intrepid, and slightly retarded at the time, I cornered the two staff members and began grilling them about why they were allowing the Senate to make a mockery of our fine institution.

"No comment."

Only they did not just say 'No Comment.' The two senior leaders were flat out blowing me off. Not because they were hiding anything or cared one way or another how things turned out.

"It's like watching them play adult." the Vice Chancellor said to me a few months later when I had moved on from the student paper

The staff that oversaw all the student activities had met before any student meetings or police were called. They knew what the outcome was going to be (no matter how the Student Senate voted). So no amount of huffing and puffing from the students newspaper or the Senate was going to rattle them.

"You were playing your part in the whole thing and we were not going to stop it," one staff member told me when I asked about it here recently

At the end of the day, they were still in charge and they knew on Monday morning next week they would still come to an office and continue to watch the students play adult...

Fast forward to our current debacle in Lawrence:

The Student President there has proposed the idea of cutting — and even eliminating — the fee students pay that goes to the student newspaper. The fee is collected each semester and makes up about $83,000 that goes to the University Daily Kansas each year (from what the UDK was reporting).

He has an axe to grind with the student paper and the student paper is a bit defensive when it comes to money — as all print publications have in the last decade.

Tempers are flaring. Chests are being pounded. Indignation is running rampant

Sure, we could get into a lengthy argument about the meaning and use of student media and its practical applications in education. Or, we could resort to citing court cases that forbid cutting funding from student media on the basis of like or dislike. We could even go so far as to talk about the financial pit we would sink those working reporters and editors into by cutting their salaries.

Instead, the one piece that everyone seems to be missing is that the Chancellor and student staff have the final say. And they have already made their decision.

Their plan is already sketched out in neat university letterhead. Whether the fee gets cut was already been decided by someone with a higher pay grade.

The students senate can pout and vote until it's blue in the face and the newspaper can run editorial temper-tantrums, but both, just as college organizations have done for years, playing adult.

And everyone has their part to play.

Donate! Attend! DRINK!

2010-03-10T11:49:00.004-06:00

There are a lot of things from my college days that I am proud to call my own.

Sure, there was the swimming pool of booze and catapulting things into the ravine next to our house and harassing Greek kids passed out in the street. There was even a weekend I drove across the Rocky Mountains just to crash a funeral....

But out of the hazy four years I called myself a student, it was my time with STRIPES that I still talk about most fondly and fairly lucidly.

STRIPES was the sober-driver program on campus that in only 4 years had given more than 50,000 free rides home to students keeping their drunk asses off the street.

Sure, it started at Texas A&M, but we still have the largest and most used program in the country.

I actually got involved with the group by accident. See, I was one of those kids that, before discovering the magical whimsy of Booze, spent my weekends in my dorm room watching movies or playing Halo. So, when the hot red-head down the hall was knocking on my door asking for new volunteers to help out that night I said yes.

As a volunteer - and all the way through the ranks as its Director - I have to say this one was of the few activities I truly loved. (It was also my first step into non-profit marketing and management, which I have turned into a career four years later)

I don't mean to wax too poetically here, so I'll get to the point:

Back in 2006, we were a 10 car operation with about 300 volunteers and thought we have reaching the Zenith when we were given the keys to a brand new office and operations center... But the program has only grown and gotten incredibly technologically savvy.

That means we need your help...

In April, STRIPES will be holding its first Fundraising Gala and Silent Auction. I am inviting you, my slack-jawed reader, to attend this inaugural event with me and help out the STRIPES program.

STRIPES GALA and SILENT AUCTION

Saturday, April 10

Columbia, Mo

6 p.m. - Reception and Cash Bar

7:30 p.m. - Dinner and Silent Auction

573.882.1669

e-mail: events.stripes@gmail.com

Let me know as I will be organizing a carpool and place to stay in Columbia for that night.

If you cannot attend but would still like to donate, shoot me an e-mail: (ekey@wednesdayweekly.com) It is an incredibly great cause (and all your donations are tax-deductible).

Donate! Attend! DRINK!

Humping the St. Louis Arch

2010-03-09T21:29:00.001-06:00

The St. Louis Arch.

It is picturesque. It is historic. It is...

...awkwardly sexual for some people...

Monday Movies

2010-03-08T08:00:00.000-06:00

Because if you want original content all weekend and on Monday, then read a Mommy-Blog...

Roger Daltrey/The Who

2010-03-05T07:59:00.003-06:00

I am probably one of the few who really enjoyed seeing the The Who play the halftime show at the Superbowl. In fact, I remember pulling the remote away from the host of the party and cranking the volume while yelling at people to shut the hell up and listen to the music (I know, always the social butterfly).

So, I enjoyed seeing Roger Daltrey open for Clapton on Wednesday. Granted, it was just him and a lot of his vocal skills have mellowed. Although, it was interesting that Simon Townshend, Pete Townshend's little brother tours with Daltrey as lead guitar.

Still, I am to young to have ever seen the original Who play live so most everything I know is from their live shows that were recorded many Loony Moons ago.

And Yes, I still get a thrill up my leg when they crank up the opening synthesizer riff for Baba O'Riley

Click though for more photos from his set.

Eric Clapton @ The Sprint Center

2010-03-04T16:58:00.003-06:00

HOLY. SHIT.

Eric Clapton can rock an arena. The show was HEAVY on the Blues and guitar noodling by Clapton. But when you can offer several 10-minute, face-melting guitar solos, then you, sir, go right ahead...

I was a little disappointed that he did the unplugged version of Layla and not the hard-driving wonky one I have no problem blasting in my car.

Still, as I said last night, our 30-year nightmare ended as Clapton did finally admit to the Sprint Arena that he shot the Sheriff...

...The mystery continues as to who shot the deputy.

Click through for more photos. Also, Roger Daltrey opened the show. I'll have this photos up tomorrow.

It's here!

2010-03-03T09:28:00.004-06:00

That's right, swine, my mystery package finally arrived. And, no, despite what some my denser readers might think, it was not the Phone Book.

Today, I finally opened up my newest decorative item to class up my apartment (which is really just the room over the garage at my Mom's house). They are a series of prints by Brandon Schaefer that are, well, bad ass.

He has done art for a ton of art covering other movies, but since Ghostbusters is my favorite and is being revived in my family I figured these were well worth the impulse buy.

My plan is to frame them individually but use them to fill one whole wall. With frames and about an inch in between, it will be enough art to fill a 3-foot by 5-foot wall — once I get a wall from which to hang such bad ass art.

Results so far have been mixed. The Roommates think I'm crazy. Others have had a bit different reaction.

"It is a handsome addition to any living space. The panties of your female visitors will instantly drop at the door."

Appreciated, Mr. Moxey, a man of uncontrollable taste and class.

Ode to outdated technology

2010-03-01T21:38:00.003-06:00

The World's most useless paper weight was delivered this week.

For a brief second I felt bad pitching it right into the trash as I walked in from the mail box. Sure, there was time when it was useful; but I no longer need a booster seat and I eventually fixed that wobbly table.

I suppose if I wanted to fake my way into a strongman contest it might come in handy. I could rip it right in half and then take a bite out of the blue government numbers section.

Monday Movies

2010-03-01T08:54:00.000-06:00

Because I am too lazy to actually write anything on a Monday.

Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus

Get ready for friend requests from grandpa...

2010-02-26T12:04:00.005-06:00

Olds can be Hilarious. Especially when they try to do things that traditionally are reserved for Those Damned Kids.

In fact, its kind of terrifying when you find out your parents are now stalking your nightly exploits on Facebook. "Yes, mom, I am a looking for friends, networking and 'random play'...DEAL!"

But let's get serious for a moment...

A couple weeks ago I started pitching the idea that there is a large need not just computer training and classes for older folks, but those classes needed to be mobile and free...

Why? Because the the elderly in KC are one of the poorest, disconnected groups in the country that, in many cases, relay on the crappiest public transportation the KCATA has to offer...

The glorious life of retirement in KC...

Anyway, Metropolitan Community College-Longview (who I do some work for) took me up on the offer and is giving me an entire day to teach as many free classes of computer basics, online skills and whatever else I can pull out of my ass. (It's not quite entirely mobile, but it is FREE)

Yes, free computer classes for anyone who wants to learn.

The whole day is part of Longview's bigger program offering a whole catalog of free classes and other resources to Baby Boomers.

Hopefully, we can make something out of the whole day.

Come on out and meet a Low Level Internet Celebrity like myself. Learn a thing or two, or just heckle from the back, you assholes.

March 13
10 a.m.
MCC-Longview
500 SW Longview Road
Lee's Summit Mo

It's almost here!

2010-02-25T19:46:00.004-06:00

The Mystery purchase is making its way from ... Tallahassee?

Get pumped for a mid-week post with the big reveal. So far I have told a total of three people... and two of them were SERIOUSLY unimpressed...

So, maybe instead of a big reveal, you all should be preparing for a big disappointment ... But you are used to that here, right?

The plot thickens

2010-02-24T16:15:00.003-06:00

The MyFaces were all a twitter when I posted one of my many terrible examples of why I should never be in charge of the family finances. The second I have the inkling I might have a surplus, I go and blow it on either booze or something absurd.

This falls closer into the category of absurd... but it is still AWESOME none the less...

What did I purchase? Just you wait and see.

Ice-Ice-Baby...

2010-02-22T20:53:00.004-06:00

The ice did not come heavy enough to cancel classes today, but it did make for some great glistening trees.

Or something... Click though to see the ice in its full-focus glory.

Monday Movies

2010-02-22T14:18:00.004-06:00

We all sighed a bit of relief when the teacher would announce we were watching a movie in class. In reality, we all knew she was just too lazy or hungover from the weekend to actually teach us anything.

And so in honor of my great public education and silly alliterations, I offer you this week's movie.

USA! USA! USA! or Tom's got issues.

Think warm...

2010-02-21T14:56:00.002-06:00

Here in our little corner of IndepMo, we have had some kind of snow on the ground since the beginning of December.

Even when the snow does melt the city look grimy, dirty and dead... that is until we get another round of snow that exists only to crush my soul... but there is a light at the end of this long, dark, miserable tunnel...

And so on this shitty Sunday, I offer you a list of things I am looking forward to once we dig out from this nightmare sometime in May:

Patio seating at Harry's Country Club
The Pool
Driving with my windows down
Outdoor music at Knuckleheads or Grinders
Heckling hipsters at First Fridays
Fireworks
Cicadas
Mowing
Outdoor barbecues
Royals games
Kickball
Outdoor movies
Titling at Bridges
Afternoon cocktails on the deck
Going somewhere without a coat
Drinking whiskey for taste not for warmth
The Attic Fan

I feel warmer just thinking about it. Feel free to add to this list.

Interesting...

2010-02-18T18:26:00.003-06:00

Just saw a commercial for season tickets to The Royals. Apparently, you can get a season ticket pack for $168 bucks... According to their Web site you can get a half season for $328 bucks (31 games, I think).

The Missouri Mavericks, on the other hand, have season tickets priced very differently. Cheapest package you can get there is $320. And from what I heard from my own sources, the Mavericks will be courting a waiting list for season ticket buyers...

Major league sports vs. Minor league sports.... and the minor leage team seems to be winning the supply and demand game of sports economics...

Granted it is an apples to oranges comparison since it is two different sports, but still, what is going on here?

Now that's a bumper sticker...

2010-02-16T20:14:00.004-06:00

My NPR Morning Anchor can beat up your NPR Morning Anchor.

That's right, Maria "Bonecrusher" Carter (far right) has long been a lethal bruiser when it comes to sports and KCUR Fun-Drives.

But now she has joined the ranks of Vicious Killer as she was drafted into the Dreadnought Dorothys Roller Derby Team (one of four in KC).

The KC Roller Warriors showcased their new members in a Bloody Valentine's Day bout on Sunday that made their rookies fight for the love of the more senior members. If this was merely an intramural scrimmage I am assuming the full-blown matches next month will involve butterfly knives and chains.

I was a little worried My Librarian would not take to the short-skirt-roller-sport... Still, knowing her blood-lust for violent sports (Mo. Maverick fights are her favorite) I figured she would fall right in line for The Derby.

For more photos from the Roller Derby insanity. Click though.

I ain't no Flickr back girl.

2010-02-15T21:08:00.003-06:00

It's been close to half a month since I broke out my old camera and actually took some photos to post here.

The creative drought came as things with the new clients have been picking up to a feverish pace and I have been pulling double duty trying to keep things together on a day-to-day front and plan out a 5-year strategy for our new Web products.

Still, I managed to catch these guys at the Kansas City Kansas Community College last week at a music benefit for area high school music programs. Usually, when someone says "Let's go see this family jam band," You get a little nervous that your night is headed for a Partridge Family nightmare...

Only tonight I spent a good portion of the evening picking up pieces of my face as it was being rocked off at a frenetic pace all night by Trampled Under Foot.

Damn.

These guy are locally grown and have gotten some great press here in the last year — even named Blues Band of the Year by The Pitch. And rightly so. These guy have been a round for a while, but they are new to me and they have a new fan, for sure.

I have a strong feeling I will be braving the cold in the East Bottoms to catch them when they play at Knuckleheads.

—————

For these photos I was sitting about 10 rows back and was shooting with no flash. Had to turn the shutter speed down to about 40 and crank the ISO up to 800. Click the photos to see more from the show.

Happy (fucking) Valentine's Day...redux

2010-02-11T15:14:00.004-06:00

Four years ago I wrote this screed about Valentine's day from work while, I assume from the spelling and grammar, drunk and angry... that was kind of a habit back in the old days of my newspaper life.

I have really changed in the four years since I banged this out with what appears to have been clubbed fingers...For this edition, I did some editing and cleaned up the language a bit... Ah, fuck it. Screw Valentine's Day. And Screw you, too.

"Why do you eat and drink so much?"
"Well, at least I can feel full rather than nothing at all."
- Bobby Hill to Bill on King of the Hill.

Wonderful, it is another great holiday where we all gather 'round and sing the hymns of love and pure kindness and other rot like that.

Valentine's Day - where we wait for Love to come bounding down the chimney to fill our stockings with various STDs and other disappointments. Well, kiddies, just like our dear friend Santa Claus, Love does not exist.

This nugget of information was not imparted to me by my professors or some role model - No! It was shouted at me by some asshole in a moving vehicle. It actually sounded more like 'Suck my Balls,' but the meaning was the same.

Of course, as people all over the country embrace and show how much they love each other despite how much weight they have yet to lose from a post-new years resolution, I sure as hell was not about to let anyone be happy around me today.

Sitting in my quasi-office one young girl came bounding in and announced that after studying and class work, her current boyfriend of the week was going to take her to dinner at some fancy place and then spend the evening with her watching a movie about how we all were simpler in high school and about how life can be summed up by one hopeless comedy of idiots who do not know shit.

I was not going to have this. So I found something I did not like about her and proceeded to yell at her for about 15 minutes.

"I was having such a good day until now," she said on the verge of tears.

"Not my problem. Fuck you."

Fuck, it was even more depressing today as I was sitting in my attorney's office and we both mused about this jovial day of mirth and frivolity.

"You know, it is kind of sad. The only phone call I am expecting to wish me a happy Valentine's day is from my Mom," my attorney thought out-loud, burying his head into the newspaper and trailing off.

The sad part was so far that day my mom had already called me. That was the only phone call I expected, too. Oh, but don't pity me or think I am some kind of abnormality.

I sit pretty comfortably at the news desk of The Missourian. The only thing I envy right now is the team of sports reporters who are violently writing and reporting the latest cluster-fuck by this athletic department.

Shit, when will this god-awful storm end.

They get to write the stories, I just sit here and read them like every other brain-dead idiot who picks up this garbage we call The Missourian.

You know, I have had fun Valentine's days in the past (grade school parties and crap in high school does not count). No, last year was amazing. There was no expectation or planning. It was just me drunk in a tree shouting nonsense to the people below. Next to me is the one woman who seemed to understand it all and continued to reach into my coat pockets for her next beer. But she is gone now.

Dan Savage was talking in his column that Valentine's day really is nothing more than a corporate holiday. Well, that is nothing new, but I did appreciate his counter-holiday to this vile event

Steak and Blow Job day.

On this day women across the country will serve up a fine steak and one blow job to each guy. Instead of chocolates and flowers - T-bone and a face fuck.

Frankly, he said, the only reason it has not made it national, is because Hallmark has yet to figure out how to fit it all on a card.

This is the kind of man who needs to be a woman — that I can date.

Rubin's Cube

2010-02-08T21:46:00.002-06:00

Alex Rubin gets his own solved Rubik's Cube cheering for him in the student section at Illinois State.

Ah, the old inflatable-wavy-arm-guy defense ... Classic.

2010-02-05T22:18:00.004-06:00

Decided to spend my evening watching the old high school basketball match here in town.

Only, the complete lack of reffing and coaching really made this Basketball game seem more like a cross between Rugby Scrum and full MMA fight... If a forward had pulled out a club and started whacking at the other team's knees, it would have actually been appropriate.

I am pretty certain, after watching only a half I know where Our Coach got his idea for his "Defense"...

"Run hard and wave your arms like a moron, boys! That will confuse and confound them in to turning over the ball!"

Get yo ass dunked indeed.

2010-02-03T09:11:00.004-06:00

My family can be real assholes sometime... Geoff, I'm looking your direction... esp since most all of them either graduated from, teach at, have large financial ties to or just love KU.

Still, if the MU basketball team is going to mock itself for its own mediocre ability, then I might as well jump on the Good-Ship Schadenfreude, too. My brother found this on Facebook. I suppose its some kind of motivational piece from one player to another...

Really though, I think it is some commentary on the Gatorade... you peaked to early, guys... you peaked too early...

This is how America was built.

2010-02-01T20:22:00.003-06:00

The Gonzo Network is wide and contains many seekers looking to make some kind of a mark in this foul country... Sadly, when I saw this from one of our former Disciples of the Temple of Gonzo, I knew we had to assemble the old team...

I sent this telegraph to my associate in Columbia and business partner in my Political/Marketing/Bar business...

Coulter, old soul,

My god... so The Teacher thinks he can throw on some facial hair talk with a Southern accent and suddenly he is JAMES-fuckin'-CARVILL.

Well, sonny, I ain't got time for losses in this fight and this Williams cat looks like a loose cannon. Maybe we need to step in earlier than I had anticipated. Load up the car and let's head down to McCain-country and get on board with this awful election process. We need to prove to America we have the cajones to turn this race for Arizona Superintendent of Public Instruction into a referendum on Capitalism.

Yeah, that's that ticket.

We'll really get those brush-headed commies running for the hills when we come screaming into the city with a live deer tied to the front of our Cadillac shooting fireworks at any johnny lawman that tries to slow us down.

"USA USA USA!" is what they will be chanting as we screech to a halt in from of his campaign headquarters and start giving orders like some Goddamned general jumping off his steed and screaming for his whores.

Yes, Mr. Jones, it's time for our plan to kick into high gear and win back America or slash and burn it to the ground trying ... are you in? I'll be at the Greyhound Station at noon tomorrow. I know you know where that is.

Just be on time for once.

Signed,
WW

That's the stuff.

Cheer Camp

2010-01-31T21:04:00.003-06:00

Cheer Camp from Wednesday Weekly on Vimeo.

Because when fat bearded guys whip out a video camera during high school cheer camp it can seem a bit creepy... unless you are related to the kiddos.

"No, officer, I swear I am allowed to be here... Yes, I am related to the two in the front row!"